By Sarah P. This blog post is the continuation of a four-part series on Dr. John Gottman’s Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. In the first blog post in this series, I discussed criticism, which was the first of the Four Horsemen. In this post, I will discuss contempt and the role it plays in destroying […]
By Sarah P. To start off the New Year well, Doug, Linda, and I decided it was time to take a closer look at how to build more successful marriages. As of today, there is no better theory on how to have successful marriages than the theories of Drs. John and Julie Gottman. Often, […]
By Sarah P. If you have been through an affair, you have come a long way, baby. You know your story backwards and forwards and have become a wiser person. You have been able to piece together how you got there and how far you have come. (By the way, I do smoke and I […]
When you are dealing with a spouse poacher, she thinks any season is a good season to poach another woman’s husband. By Sarah P. You have been through it and you know the drill. Your husband has been unfaithful and you are unsure whether or not he will be unfaithful again. To make matters worse, […]
Neither the Supermodel Nor the Housewife Wins: Hedonic Adaptation in Relationships and How it Could Play a Role in Infidelity
By Sarah P. What do men like Arnold Schwarzenegger, Robin Williams, Ben Affleck, Jude Law, and Hugh Grant have in common? On the other side, what do women like Adrianna Lima, Christie Brinkley, Shania Twain, Jennifer Garner, and Liz Hurley have in common? All of these people are bound together by a commonality that has […]
Making this D-Day your last has three key components or considerations. Making this D-Day your last requires activity and honest assessment on your part. I will first discuss the elements that help in rebuilding a marriage after infidelity. If those don’t work, you can still stay if you choose to. However, there are times when […]
This week Bella Ryan was kind enough to write a guest post for us offering her observations and opinions on the possible reasons why people cheat. Thanks Bella! Cheating on Your Spouse – Understanding the Dilemma Did you know that more than 50% of people in committed relationships cheat on each other? What’s more astounding […]
POST UPDATE: So it finally happened. After more than 6 years, I ran into the OW. Well sort of. Just about every day at some point, me and my faithful dog head out for about a 3-mile hike on some trails at a county park near our home. It’s been hot as hell around here […]
by Sarah P. I firmly believe that if a couple is to recover from an affair, there are certain behaviors that must be changed. There are other behaviors that must be dropped altogether if recovery is to be possible. The behavior that needs to go is flirting. I believe that extreme flirtation opens the door […]
Cheating Men: If you are one of them, don’t be fooled by what evolutionary psychology says about your wiring
By Sarah P. I have found that many men’s favorite straw-man argument that validates infidelity is the argument that men have evolved to have a sole purpose in life: to spread their seed. This spurious argument, which has been brought forth by evolutionary psychologists, allows men less accountability for non-monogamous behavior. I will hand it to […]
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This short guide tells you what you need to know to survive the affair, heal yourself and emerge on the other side a stronger person.
- It’s Tough To Stop an Emotional Affair March 15, 2011
- When the Other Woman Becomes the Wife September 6, 2012
- Real Reasons the Emotional Affair Happened February 2, 2012
- Staying After Cheating: Is It the Right Thing to Do? October 11, 2016
- How Does A Betrayed Spouse Heal from Cheating? July 5, 2013
- Open House Discussion August 28, 2013
- Does the Other Woman Play A Role In an Affair or Does the Blame Land Solely on the Cheating Husbands? YOU Decide July 19, 2016
- Discussion: Why Do Men and Women Cheat? October 5, 2011
- Musings on Infidelity: Affairs Are Not Original and Not Excusable March 28, 2017
- Struggling to Heal? You Have to Reach! March 21, 2017
- The Last of the Four Horsemen: Stonewalling March 14, 2017
- You Decide: Is it an emotional affair or not? March 7, 2017
- John Gottman’s Four Horsemen: Defensiveness February 28, 2017
- Coping with the Pain of Infidelity February 21, 2017
- Discussion: What Stage of the Affair Recovery Process are You In at Present? February 14, 2017
- Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Part 2: Contempt February 7, 2017
- Tired: I just re read this article. It is so spot on. My ...
- Tired: Also Puzzled, that blank and angry stare. I have s...
- Tired: Puzzled. I think we will go to counselling. Perhap...
- Shifting Impressions: Puzzled I love that fishbowl idea........I think ...
- Puzzled: Keeping her from becoming defensive is the challen...
- Hopefull: Puzzled, These conversations are so hard. My husba...
- Robert M.: So I haven't mentioned anything about the affair ...
- Doug: That's good to hear Broken2! Though it sucks bad ...
- Affair Signs
- After the Affair
- Catch a Cheating Spouse
- Dealing with Infidelity
- Emotional Affairs
- Ending an Affair
- Forgiving Infidelity
- Healing From Infidelity
- Marriage Building
- Our Emotional Affair Story
- Preventing Infidelity
- Save Your Marriage
- Self Help
- Sex and Marriage
- Surviving an Affair