By Sarah P. The things that people say and do during affairs are so predictable that it is almost funny. Unfortunately, broken trust, destroyed lives, and broken families are no laughing matter. Still, there are patterns that all affairs follow; there are universal actions on the part of the wayward spouse; and there are the […]
By Sarah P. This post is the third segment in the John Gottman’s Four Horsemen series. In this post, I will be discussing defensiveness. But, before we jump into the post, I would like for you to watch this video. It’s only about 5 minutes long so let’s dive in: I really like […]
We received an email the other day from a reader who writes the following: I have been in contact with you during the last few months. Your site continues to be a great resource for me as I have come to terms with what happened in my marriage. We are the couple […]
By Sarah P. The one question that people ask after their partner has had an affair is “why?” There are many answers to this question, but not enough information on what to do about it. In this blog post, I will talk about my own answer to the “why” and “what.” But first, let’s define […]
I was exchanging emails with a woman recently whose husband had an affair lasting about 2 years, and whose behavior since discovery has been incredibly bad. During our exchange, she forwarded me some texts that her husband had sent where he was expressing his deep sense of guilt and that he ‘didn’t know if he […]
By Sarah P. Do you know how to spot a commitment-phobic person? It’s easy to spot the glaring examples of these people, but not so easy to spot clandestine commitment phobes. (I will call them CCP for short.) Most people have probably seen or heard about the film Runaway Bride that starred Julia Roberts. Each […]
By Sarah P. Living with integrity means: Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships. Asking for what you want and need from others. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on […]
By Sarah P. Empathy is the most mysterious transaction that the human soul can have, and it’s accessible to all of us, but we have to give ourselves the opportunity to identify, to plunge ourselves in a story where we see the world from the bottom up or through another’s eyes or heart.” – Sue Monk […]
By Sarah P. If you have been through an affair, you have come a long way, baby. You know your story backwards and forwards and have become a wiser person. You have been able to piece together how you got there and how far you have come. (By the way, I do smoke and I […]
Does the Other Woman Play A Role In an Affair or Does the Blame Land Solely on the Cheating Husbands? YOU Decide
By Sarah P. You have heard it many times: when a husband has an affair, he is 100% responsible for the affair. While this is absolutely true, it lets the other woman off the hook. I want to look at it another way: the wayward husband is 100% responsible for his role in the affair, […]
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This short guide tells you what you need to know to survive the affair, heal yourself and emerge on the other side a stronger person.
- It’s Tough To Stop an Emotional Affair March 15, 2011
- When the Other Woman Becomes the Wife September 6, 2012
- Real Reasons the Emotional Affair Happened February 2, 2012
- Staying After Cheating: Is It the Right Thing to Do? October 11, 2016
- How Does A Betrayed Spouse Heal from Cheating? July 5, 2013
- Open House Discussion August 28, 2013
- Does the Other Woman Play A Role In an Affair or Does the Blame Land Solely on the Cheating Husbands? YOU Decide July 19, 2016
- Discussion: Why Do Men and Women Cheat? October 5, 2011
- Musings on Infidelity: Affairs Are Not Original and Not Excusable March 28, 2017
- Struggling to Heal? You Have to Reach! March 21, 2017
- The Last of the Four Horsemen: Stonewalling March 14, 2017
- You Decide: Is it an emotional affair or not? March 7, 2017
- John Gottman’s Four Horsemen: Defensiveness February 28, 2017
- Coping with the Pain of Infidelity February 21, 2017
- Discussion: What Stage of the Affair Recovery Process are You In at Present? February 14, 2017
- Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Part 2: Contempt February 7, 2017
- Tired: I just re read this article. It is so spot on. My ...
- Tired: Also Puzzled, that blank and angry stare. I have s...
- Tired: Puzzled. I think we will go to counselling. Perhap...
- Shifting Impressions: Puzzled I love that fishbowl idea........I think ...
- Puzzled: Keeping her from becoming defensive is the challen...
- Hopefull: Puzzled, These conversations are so hard. My husba...
- Robert M.: So I haven't mentioned anything about the affair ...
- Doug: That's good to hear Broken2! Though it sucks bad ...
- Affair Signs
- After the Affair
- Catch a Cheating Spouse
- Dealing with Infidelity
- Emotional Affairs
- Ending an Affair
- Forgiving Infidelity
- Healing From Infidelity
- Marriage Building
- Our Emotional Affair Story
- Preventing Infidelity
- Save Your Marriage
- Self Help
- Sex and Marriage
- Surviving an Affair