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four horsemen - contempt

Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse Part 2: Contempt

By Sarah P. This blog post is the continuation of a four-part series on Dr. John Gottman’s Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. In the first blog post in this series, I discussed criticism, which was the first of the Four Horsemen. In this post, I will discuss contempt and the role it plays in destroying […]

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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse – Part One: Criticism

  By Sarah P. To start off the New Year well, Doug, Linda, and I decided it was time to take a closer look at how to build more successful marriages. As of today, there is no better theory on how to have successful marriages than the theories of Drs. John and Julie Gottman. Often, […]

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Christmas church (2)

Merry Christmas!

Photo by Forest Wander   My Christmas Wish To YOU By Catherine Pulsifer If I could wish a wish for you, it would be for peace, faith, and happiness not only at Christmas, but for the whole year through! I wish that there always be food on your table. That you always give to those […]

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rebuilding a marriage

Make This D-Day Your Last – What Works in Rebuilding a Marriage after Infidelity

Making this D-Day your last has three key components or considerations. Making this D-Day your last requires activity and honest assessment on your part. I will first discuss the elements that help in rebuilding a marriage after infidelity. If those don’t work, you can still stay if you choose to. However, there are times when […]

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after the emotional affair

After the Emotional Affair – The Path to Introspection (Slightly Updated)

  Self-exploration is very painful, but unless you do that, you will never know who you are and who you want to be.— Iris Apfel Many readers have mentioned that their cheating spouses are not doing what is necessary to help them heal from their emotional or physical affair. The cheater is not working on themselves […]

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Backsliding During Reconciliation

Be On the Alert for Backsliding During Reconciliation

After a couple has determined that reconciliation is their goal, they typically work their tails off for months, maybe years, to mend and strengthen their marriage.  They manage to rediscover lost elements of their relationship and they may eventually even get to a point where they feel their marriage is going great – perhaps even […]

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acadia_lighthouse

33 Observations from Two Weeks on the Road

It certainly is great to be back home after our two-week family getaway to New England.  After all, who doesn’t want to get back to 3000 emails, a foot high stack of mail, a ton of work to catch up on and a new school year just right around the corner?  Why would anyone want […]

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30th

30 Years and Counting

Today we have been married for 30 years.  That’s a long time. But it’s just another day. I’m working.  Linda is off to her chiropractor appointment and then to the store.  The girls are at their summer college classes and our son is traveling back from a trip out West.  Oh, and our dog is asleep […]

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being vulnerable again after you have been betrayed

Being Vulnerable Again after You Have Been Betrayed

Last Friday was Doug’s annual outing with a bunch of his old high school buddies.  It’s when they go golfing, attend a baseball game and hit the bars afterwards.  Basically they act about 35 years younger than they all are.  Then they go home and recuperate for the rest of the weekend! Anyways, after their […]

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How to Become Trustworthy After the Affair

Cheating Spouses: How to Become Trustworthy After the Affair

By Sarah P. Betrayed spouses report that one of the most harmful things about infidelity, if not the most harmful thing in some cases, is the loss of Trust. The reason I capitalize the word Trust is because you haven’t just become semi-untrustworthy, but rather completely untrustworthy after you have been unfaithful.  Trust is one […]

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