A Mentor Can Help You Find Strength, Hope and Direction. We Understand What You're Going Through. We've Been There.
We've Felt the Same Way. We've Made the Same Mistakes. We Survived. So Can You!
- Oftentimes the best teacher is experience itself. Learn from a those who have traveled the same path you are now on.
- Learning is based on your agenda, priorities, questions, and needs — not on a preset program.
- With our mentoring program we focus on supporting, strengthening, educating and encouraging you.
- Get an honest point of view that is unbiased, objective, straight-forward and understanding.
- Extremely convenient. Mentoring can be done in the comfort of your home via telephone.
I have learned so much from your blog and our mentoring sessions. I really have no idea how I would have gotten through this without your help. I am a spiritual person, and I know you will be blessed in your life with all you do for others.Annie
Have You Ever Been Confused About What to Do?
Back when we began our journey of affair recovery and healing a few years ago, we did so alone - without the help of anyone else.
In hindsight, it would have been immensely valuable if we would have had someone mentoring us - someone who could have provided the hope and direction we so desperately needed to successfully move forward.
It would have been wonderful to have spoken with someone who had survived and flourished after going through similar experiences.
Because of this we believe mentors are a critical part of the healing and recovery process.
So What is Mentoring All About?
It’s not a quick fix. Experts agree that affair recovery can take a minimum of two years, though we have seen many couples heal faster depending on the type of affair they were faced with. Ultimately, it doesn’t really matter how long it takes, but that you get to where you want to go.
A growth opportunity. It gives you the opportunity to learn about you and your relationships, and ultimately helps move you through the healing process faster. You will never be the same, person and your relationship will never be the same either.
A guiding hand. Healing from an affair just doesn’t happen! It probably won’t happen if you go it alone. You need input. You need support. You need new information. And, primarily, it is very important to have someone walk along with you, encourage you and show you new roads. Sometimes it's simply just a person to talk to.
Mentoring starts with you and your situation. We work together to help find the strength and strategies you need to do exactly what is best for you and those closest to you. This is based on your priorities, questions and needs - not ours.
We are human. We do not have all the answers. We never will have all the answers. We mentor from our own experiences - our mistakes and successes. Our role is sometimes to be the answer, sometimes to have the answer, and sometimes to know where to find the answer.
The Advantages of Mentoring with Us
We are not therapists nor counselors, but we have personally been through what you are going through and have made the same mistakes along the way. We have learned a tremendous amount during our journey as well - real life practical knowledge that we can pass on.
We have rebuilt our marriage when at one point it seemed hopeless. So, we are indeed survivors.
Our experiences give us genuine compassion for your situation, your pain and your struggles. We understand recovery, healing and the difficult emotions you encounter after infidelity.
We can give you perspectives from both sides of the affair - the betrayed spouse and the unfaithful spouse.
“I wanted to let you know how fortunate I am to have found your website and mentoring program. It has been one year post d-day after my husband’s 2 year emotional affair that eventually led to a physical one. Even though my husband has re-committed to our marriage and has been doing all the right things I still have times that my emotions get the best of me. Thank you so much Linda for your mentoring and getting me through some difficult challenges. Thank you for your great advice and for giving me hope and confidence. It is such a blessing to have you guys to turn to.” - Angela, WA
Here's What Mentoring Can Do For You
Remember that mentoring is only as good as you make it. This is your program based on your needs. We do not "coach" you or give you exercises or any of that stuff. It's simply utilizing our abilities, knowledge and experiences to support, educate and guide you towards your goals. That said, here are some things that mentoring can do for you...
Avoid Common Mistakes
We made every mistake in the book when we first started. We learned from them and can pass our knowledge along so you don’t do the same things.
Identify Your Strengths and Challenges
It can be extremely encouraging to see what you do have going for you as a couple. Is your marriage one that can/should be saved? It’s also helpful to clearly identify your challenges.
Gain Clear Direction
Often couples wonder, are we doing the right things? With a mentor who has gone through the same thing as you have, you can have confidence you’re on the right track.
Understand Both Sides
There are no “bad guys” in our mentoring sessions. Because we thoroughly understand the unique pain and challenges of both sides of the affair, each party will feel understood. Mentoring avoids bias. We’re on the side of saving your marriage.
Identify Hidden Issues
Most couples waste time arguing over surface issues (without realizing it), so they talk in circles, and never really resolve anything. Mentoring can help you identify the “real” issues you and your spouse are hurting over, so you can actually move forward.
Save Time and Agony
It’s understandable to feel that you don’t want to “air your dirty laundry.” Sadly, however, trying to do it on your own usually takes longer and is harder than necessary. With specific guidance for your unique challenges, you can heal thoroughly, faster, and it doesn’t have to be that hard.
Here’s What a Few of Our Clients Had to Say…
Thank you so much Linda and Doug! Your support through the mentor program is just amazing. When you couple that with the support I've received from friends and family, I consider myself a blessed man…Thank you! Thank you for helping me through some of my darkest days, helping me see that I am better than who I was told I am. Helping me see what's really important and helping me take the steps to get where I need to be.
I have sent you a picture of my kids and I. This is my “new” family. These are the faces of the people you have mentored for some time and I so truly appreciate the experience of speaking to you, because it has made my journey easier to deal with, no matter what the outcome. Having a support system is so important and I am grateful to have the ones I have had over this trying time in my life. And we will be fine. I truly believe we will.
My heart felt lighter after I spoke with Linda, it was a very good session for me to be able to connect with someone who understands and gets it. Many websites and blogs give sound advice but I can resonate with Doug and Linda most. At this point it's just good to have someone to listen, to tell me it's all going to be ok someday. The journey is far too lonely.
- B & R
We credit Linda and Doug with saving our sanity and our 35 year marriage. We were fortunate to find them on D-day and begin our recovery with “Survive and Thrive”. A year later we have now read extensively and worked through another well-regarded program, but we keep coming back to Doug and Linda for sage and grounded wisdom won through their own lived experience, their extensive research, and the community they have created. When we plateaued, we asked them to mentor us privately, and that remains a tremendous blessing. Early in our recovery we worked with Sarah, who adroitly led us to recognize that my husband has been dismissive avoidant since childhood. He is still working through that and other issues, and now Doug is also helping him become more emotionally available and consistent with me.
I have so many wide-ranging questions, and Linda wisely, compassionately, and encouragingly guides me with her wealth of experience and her ability to send me a podcast or book suggestion for every topic I encounter and need/want to learn more about. I have always been well-read and confident, but I am learning so much that helps me become an even stronger and wiser woman, wife, friend, daughter, and mother. I truly believe the lessons we learn through EAJ will be passed on for generations; I only wish we had known them years ago. I am at the astonishing point where I can be grateful that the EA’s happened, because I see how our marriage already is, and promises to be, healthier, more intimate, and more joyful than ever.
Forever Gratefully, B&R
Our goal is to empower you, point you in the right direction and give you skills to heal your life and relationship … and to take your marriage to the next level. We look forward to helping you heal, get beyond the pain, and build a happy life on the other side of the affair.
Linda & Doug
Legal Disclaimer: Emotional Affair Journey's Mentoring program is not counseling, nor is it a substitute for counseling. It is a self-paced, self-directed support resource. Linda and Doug are not counselors or therapists. If you need professional counseling, please seek a licensed professional therapist in your area.