After an affair is discovered, in most cases a metamorphosis begins for the unfaithful spouse. Up until that time he/she may have been carrying on as if nothing was going on. They were stealthy in their ways and they thought they would never get caught. Then it happens. The affair is discovered. It could have […]
Affair Counseling – A Specialized Focus by Tim Tedder, LMHC, NCC Imagine a man with high blood pressure being hit by a truck while crossing a street. He smashes to the pavement, broken and bloodied, and a nearby doctor rushes to his aid. The doctor quickly assesses the situation and then exclaims, “Man, you’re in […]
The other day we received an email from a woman who has been betrayed by her husband of 27 years. His affair was both an EA and PA and not surprisingly it has torn her world apart. Though they’ve been able to “work things out,” the aftereffects of the affair still linger – some minor […]
We’ve had this blog now for almost five years, and over that period of time we’ve had the honor of communicating with thousands of people who have been affected in some way by infidelity. It just so happens that about 85% of the time it has been with those whose spouse has been unfaithful. In […]
We’ve used the word victim a lot on this site; typically with respect to the person who has been betrayed by their partner’s infidelity. We use the term because the betrayed is indeed a victim. If you question that for any reason, then here is the official dictionary definition of victim: a person who suffers […]
A few months ago I was mentoring a younger woman (younger than me at least) and she had recently discovered her husband’s 2-year long physical and emotional affair. Needless to say she was not in a good place at the time. As she told her story it became apparent that the affair was becoming extremely […]
We’ve certainly discussed the fact that surviving an affair requires communication – effective communication, that is, So today we wanted to give you some additional Do’s and Don’ts for improving communication, as well as introduce you to the ACTION formula. Marriage and Family Therapist, Jeff Murrah LPC, LMFT, LCDC delivered these nuggets during a webinar we […]
We came across the following piece of advice somewhere online. Neither one of us can remember exactly where, though it has the distinct feel of the Marriage Builders forum. In general, it offers sound advice for betrayed spouses to follow after affair discovery. As with any advice piece, it may not apply in its entirety […]
For the next couple of weeks both Linda and I will be extremely busy. I’ve got a huge event going on for work that will demand a ton of my time, while Linda is dealing with her mother who was just diagnosed with possible kidney cancer. (It was detected early so we’re pretty sure she […]
I can remember it like it was yesterday… It was just after 2:00 in the morning and I couldn’t sleep. Something Doug said earlier that evening just didn’t sit right with me. He’d also been acting quite strange lately. I had a gnawing feeling in my gut that something just wasn’t right. I quietly slipped […]
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- It’s Tough To Stop an Emotional Affair March 15, 2011
- Real Reasons the Emotional Affair Happened February 2, 2012
- When the Other Woman Becomes the Wife September 6, 2012
- How Does A Betrayed Spouse Heal from Cheating? July 5, 2013
- Open House Discussion August 28, 2013
- Discussion: Why Do Men and Women Cheat? October 5, 2011
- How it all started December 18, 2009
- Lessons Learned from the Other Woman in an Emotional Affair December 5, 2014
- Nip Flirting In the Bud Before It Happens (Again) July 28, 2015
- 33 Observations from Two Weeks on the Road July 24, 2015
- We’re Hitting the Road Again July 3, 2015
- How About Sharing More About Yourself? June 30, 2015
- Are People With Avoidant Personality Disorder More Likely To Cheat On Their Partners? June 26, 2015
- The Five Phases a Cheater Goes Through After an Affair is Discovered June 23, 2015
- 30 Years and Counting June 19, 2015
- Finding an Affair Recovery Specialist June 16, 2015
- TheFirstWife: I would watch my H be a little flirty with other w...
- Shifting Impressions: Interesting....perhaps we should define "Flirting...
- SoSorry: I cheated on my husband two years ago and I am sti...
- Doug: Thanks HB! Glad we could lighten up your day a li...
- Angela: Unfortunately, I did every single thing on that li...
- Heartbroken: Ha Ha some of your comments made me laugh out loud...
- antiskank: At the beginning I confronted my CH after finding ...
- tryingtorecover: It's the "club" you don't want to join, but on...
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