What are the implications of having an affair during the coronavirus?
By Sarah P.
This is a subject that I have been hesitant to tackle due to the political discussions revolving around the coronavirus.
This blog post is about the implications of having an affair when the coronavirus is still ravaging the world.
As we know, one of the main ways to prevent oneself from getting the coronavirus is wearing a mask and keeping at least a 6 foot distance between people.
If somebody is having a physical affair, it is pretty much impossible to social distance!
I have been thinking about the implications of physical affairs and the fact that the nature of a physical affair could spread the coronavirus to many innocent individuals.
After all, once a person enters their home, they generally take off their mask. They generally sit on the couch and/or have dinner at the dinner table with family members. If elderly individuals , children, and immunocompromised individuals are in a household where someone is having an affair, the person having an affair is risking exposing family members who have no say.
Other family members could be wearing masks at all times, getting vaccinated, and following social distance rules. But if one person in the family participates in a physical affair, which is sure to spread the coronavirus, there are serious implications here.
While it could be argued that innocent family members are going to be exposed to the virus anyways, the exposure they receive is generally passive exposure. For example, a stranger at the grocery store may not follow a social distancing rule. If that stranger has the coronavirus, they could be spreading it to others. But, the stranger at the grocery store likely won’t be engaging in the behavior that exposes others to the virus over and over again.
Having an Affair During the Coronavirus – Imagine this Scenario…
Imagine that a betrayed spouse does not know that their spouse is having an affair. Since most affairs happen with coworkers, if a spouse is on site with a coworker and having a physical affair, they risk exposing their family members to the virus unnecessarily. In other words, this is a situation which they could control, but they choose not to. They choose to have a physical affair, regardless of the far-reaching implications this could have on their own children, their spouse, and elderly family members.
I have wanted to discuss this topic for a long time, but I was not sure how to approach it. It’s a very depressing topic, yet I feel it’s one that we need to bring to the light of day. The reason we need to discuss this is because a cheater is making a choice to possibly expose innocent people – over and over again.
I would hope that if there are wayward spouses reading this blog post, this would cause them to cease their physical affair immediately. I would hope that wayward spouses look inward, push aside all the excuses and rationalizations that allow them to continue, and do the right thing: Break off the affair.
Featured Download: “The Top 10 Reasons to Leave Your Affair Partner Now”
If you’re the unfaithful, get it, read it and carefully consider the advice. If you’re the betrayed, give it to your unfaithful spouse.
Sure, wayward spouses could have other rationalizations like their affair partners take COVID tests. That may or may not be true.
If someone is able to live a big lie, it’s a piece of cake to live a small one. Also, wayward spouses sometimes idealize their affair partner and believe their affair partner is honest with them.
People who have affairs are generally not honest with themselves while they are still having an affair. They build a narrative based on lies and rationalizations. While in the throes of the affair, this narrative flows over and they often lose track of any semblance of truth.
At the end of the day, I am genuinely concerned about physical affairs when we are still dealing with coronavirus outbreaks.
Someone having a physical affair is committing acts which could prove deadly to people such as their own small children.
Readers, what do you think?
Do I have reason to have concern?
What are your concerns and observations?
15 replies to "The Implications of Having an Affair During the Coronavirus"
Thank you for this article! My husband started an affair at the beginning of 2020 and continued it through July 2021!
This has been something I have though about so often. I have been amazed at the level of negigence and lack of caring by my husband–no mask (obviously), no sexual protection. All those bodily fluids… My husband got Covid-19 in November of 2020. His affair partner is 24 years younger, so she had no availability to the vaccine when it became available and since my husband was only 64 at the time he was not on the 1st tier of vaccinations. Praise God, I am in Emergency Medicine and was vaccinated the 1st day it was available to the public.
Again, thank you for bringing the subject up. This goes way beyond “politics.” I have watched dozens of people die from this virus and it is sad to see that we have not realized its power YET!
I used to be a nurse, so I understand your frustration. I can’t imagine dealing with infidelity during this pandemic and knowing the cheater put our lives at risk and particularly those of our children.
Ugh.
I agree of the uncaring of thr unfaithful person to expose the family to Covid but I think this post is insensitive about individuals who have undergone the trauma of Covid. I was the unfaithful spouse and this morning after my husband read this article he commented on how I was looking for covid and I got it. I contracted covid almost a year after my infidelity. I was 8 months pregnant with our son, I spend 3 weeks in the hospital on oxygen and was flat lined while delivering. I know as the unfaithful I do not deserve any sympathy and I DO NOT defend my affair at any cost but I think this post is insensitive to the aspect that there are people who are contacting Covid long after an affair and this post is just too soon since the whole world is still struggling with this virus.
“The unfaithful”…..first let me say I’m glad you and your baby made it through. I also coded during a delivery (with my first baby 26 years ago!). I ended up on cardiac medication for a year afterwards and almost needed a surgical procedure to fix my arrhythmia. I encourage you to process your experience and emotions around it with a trusted and trained professional. I did not, and was forced to deal with it several years later when some anxiety attacks struck seemingly out of the blue. I also will say I didn’t adequately address my husbands fears when we planned for our next pregnancy. Likely because I wasn’t ready to face my own. Ok. Lecture over, ha! But it’s a traumatic experience.
Now let’s address the infidelity piece. When my husband began his affair, we had been married over 20 years, with four kids. In retrospect, my first clue something was wrong was when my cycles began to go haywire. I’ll spare everyone the details, other than to say I ended up needing not one but two blood transfusions and had to have a complete hysterectomy. This in turn threw me into instant menopause. Again, I’ll spare you all the details of that. My husband and I were high school sweethearts, each others’ “first and only”. Until his affair. My doctor thinks my body had some sort of response to the HPV his affair partner had (and initially lied about to him…not that I think it would have stopped him, sadly). I also suffered through several raging kidney infections thanks to being exposed to foreign bacteria. My health has been seriously impacted by his choice to cheat.
Now imagine what you went through with Covid. Imagine for a moment that your husband cheated on you, got exposed to Covid BY HIS AFFAIR PARTNER, brought the infection home to YOU and it nearly cost your life and the life of your unborn child. How would you feel? Knowing it was completely and totally avoidable, but he CHOSE it. He CHOSE an affair over your life and your child’s life.
As I type this, my best friend is recovering from breast cancer reconstructive surgery. Her husbands response to her cancer diagnosis (at the heighth of the pandemic) was to join a dating app and meet up with women in bars. Despite her doctors warning the family Covid could be deadly for her while on chemo. He contracted Covid, brought it home to her and she got it too. She passed out, fell and severely broke her back. She spent almost two weeks in the hospital for that. On top of all the cancer treatments snd surgeries. So like it or not? This is an absolutely VITAL CONVERSATION. Cheaters are selfish. But Covid elevates that selfishness to a potentially murderous level.
My partner visited prostitutes while I was was receiving treatment for stage 3 cancer & had just come out of surgery. He didn’t care what he brought home to me when I was so vulnerable. Our physical relationship had dwindled not because of my illness but because of his drinking, so he decided to fulfil his needs elsewhere. I was devastated & have gone through the worst 3 months of my life, his betrayal was worse than my cancer diagnosis-as that was random, this was deliberate. I decided to let him stay as we still have 2 children at home although they are late teens & because I need the practical support as I’ve just finished chemo. My children don’t know, they’d never speak to him again. He has dramatically cut down his drinking & has promised this was a one off. I’m traumatised by the whole thing & don’t know how I’m going to get over it. We have been together 37 years & I’ve never had worries about other women. My mind is tormented. I’m going to try get better & reassess the situation then
Sheila, I’m so sorry for what you are going through. Similar story to what my bestie is experiencing. Take the time to do what you need to do for YOU. My husband didn’t want to tell our older two (late teens at the time his AP outed the affair) but I had a feeling they knew more than we though they did, and I was right. I also needed them to know what was going on and why some changes were going to be made. I wasn’t going to make it easier for him to appear to be the good guy when he was anything but. I knew if he didn’t have some accountability and consequences he would try to sweep it under the rug. Recovery is hard. Recovering from cancer and affair would be grueling. I hope you have some solid support in your corner!
Thank you for your kind comments- I have told virtually no one, only one friend who lives in another country so I’m not in that much contact, although I know she’s there if I need her. I feel so alone & weak. Just trying to get through one day at a time. I now have disc degeneration so in a lot of pain. I’m sure all the mental anguish has not done me any good physically
My situation is Less about exposure to the virus as is it is to the fact that my wife started her affair at the beginning of Covid. Now every mention of Covid or coronavirus is an actual trigger that causes me to react in some way. I used to breakdown but now I just always leave the room and take a walk. How will I ever get rid of a trigger like that???? I don’t know but I’m get to try every hour of every day.
Hello Everyone,
Thank you for all of your comments.
I knew this would be a bit of a controversial article, but I felt it was necessary to write.
I have come across several immuno compromised individuals, in my personal life, and they live in fear of going to the grocery store. Anyone with a medical background knows it’s possible to become exposed even in random, public places. There are many ways to minimize risk of infection when going to the store or other public places. But, there is nothing that completely mitigates risk except for sheltering in place and following all protocols recommended by the World Health Organization.
This article is about people making choices that WILL spread the virus and there is no way around that. A physical affair will almost always expose someone to the virus, due to the high rate of contagion.
ExerciseGrace, what your friend has gone through, is a horrendous example of what happens when someone has an affair on their spouse, during the pandemic. Your friend’s body will be forever changed due to her broken back. It all could have been prevented, but instead she must suffer consequences for someone else’s poor choices. 😢😢
Brian, I am so sorry that your wife had an affair. 😔
That must be tough to be triggered every time you hear a word. I suppose it could also be called SARS
(Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome). I am sure as new variants come out we will move further away from the trigger word, that shall not be mentioned.
Lisa E. thank you for sharing your experience as an emergency medicine professional. You are so fortunate to have received the vaccine 🙏 I know many medical professionals who have died over the past year. Today I received the shocking news, that a medical professional I have known and for whom I had great respect, died of the virus. I am aware this person had to take medications that suppressed their immune system as a side effect.
It’s really shocking.
I hope everyone reading this article understands this is not about politics. It’s about a public health concern, which can effect all of us.
And it’s a plea for wayward spouses to BREAK OFF the affair. Wayward spouses, you really don’t want to carry the burden of being the person who is responsible for an innocent person falling ill or WORSE. 🙏