We receive many emails from readers, and recently we received one that really struck a chord with us. This reader shares her touching story of immense pain as the result of infidelity, as well as her hopeful view of the future and her decision to seek happiness and love no matter what.
I personally was moved by this email from “Erin” and I thought that it could do the same for others. Feel free to share your thoughts and encouragement in the comment section.
Here is the email…
“Thank you for all your help. My marriage of 30 years ended in March of this year. I still love him, always have. He wanted a divorce, I did not. I am trying to start some sort of life by myself and it is so hard. I miss him so much. I never have been told why or what I did to cause it or who has taken my place in his life.
He is still in our home, with someone else. I live only a couple of miles from there and try not to go too close to my old neighborhood. I feel awful and cry all the time. I do not want anything bad to happen to him or his future however, I feel life is so unfair for me right now.
He has done some pretty bad things to many people and I am the one who is punished. My health is bad. I have skin cancer, lots of medical bills and on and on. He has love from someone he is with and life is so good for him.
My children live far away, friends are busy and I get so lonely. I have done a lot of reading and writing, crying, and beating up on myself. Maybe if I were thinner, younger, prettier, smarter, had a successful career earning lots of money, he would have not wanted a divorce.
Now I hear he tells all sorts of actual lies to friends of both of ours. That hurts. There is no reason that I can think of as to why he would lie. I never did anything wrong except give him my love for 30 years and be very patient and try to do everything he ever ask of me.
One day he just did not want me anymore and started pushing me away whenever I reached for him. I never gave up and never got angry. Now, it is over and I am devastated.
I am trying to put my mind in a better place. I have decided to be happy no matter what goes on. People who know me will know the difference between the truth and a lie. I will get healthy and will find a place for me in this world.
I have come to realize that when I was with him all those years, that is where I was supposed to be – at the time. Now, my life with him is over and I look forward to what is next for me.
Of course I hope, at my age, it is good and that God will place me where I am wanted, as well as needed. I look forward to being able to laugh with ease again, to wake up every morning with a smile and look forward to the day ahead. I gave him power over me for 30 years that could at times be abusive and I will not let him destroy me anymore.
God grant me help in the days ahead. I want to stop hurting. I want to live in happiness and love.”