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How to Use Empathy to Communicate Effectively

At the Heart of Attachment: How to Use Empathy to Communicate Effectively For On-Going Recovery

By Sarah P. Empathy is the most mysterious transaction that the human soul can have, and it’s accessible to all of us, but we have to give ourselves the opportunity to identify, to plunge ourselves in a story where we see the world from the bottom up or through another’s eyes or heart.”  – Sue Monk […]

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male infidelity

You Have Come A Long Way, Baby! – Female Gender Roles as an Attempt to Curtail Male Infidelity

By Sarah P. If you have been through an affair, you have come a long way, baby. You know your story backwards and forwards and have become a wiser person. You have been able to piece together how you got there and how far you have come. (By the way, I do smoke and I […]

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the other woman

Does the Other Woman Play A Role In an Affair or Does the Blame Land Solely on the Cheating Husbands? YOU Decide

By Sarah P. You have heard it many times: when a husband has an affair, he is 100% responsible for the affair. While this is absolutely true, it lets the other woman off the hook.  I want to look at it another way: the wayward husband is 100% responsible for his role in the affair, […]

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when affairs are deadly

When Affairs Are Deadly: Suicide and Grieving

By Sarah P. No one ever knows to what extent infidelity can truly consume a life. Like a fire, infidelity is indiscriminate in whom it harms and like an out-of-control blaze; it harms everyone and everything in its path. The fall out of infidelity burns through families and lives. The unfortunate truth that nothing that […]

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boundaries after the affair

Boundaries After the Affair – How to Use Physical, Geographical, and Emotional Boundaries to Move Forward

  by Sarah P. After you find out about your husband’s or wife’s affair, the very first thing that you must realize is that nothing will be normal again. Your task is to create a new normal as a couple and that normal includes a marriage that will ultimately be better than before. But that […]

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rebuilding your marraige

When You Decide to Stay: Dealing with triggers and the issue of trust while rebuilding your marriage.

Sarah P.     About 15 years ago, I was interviewing for a contract position at a tech company. The hiring manager wanted an informal interview, so he and I went and had lunch at the company cafeteria. He didn’t have a filter and the conversation went like this: “You know, trust is a really […]

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serial cheater

A Tale of Two Cheaters: Are You Married to a Reverse Prince Charming or a Fallen Prince Charming?

How to Tell the Difference and Why It’s Important to Know the Difference. Sarah P.   Some men never stop looking for the affair – they are serial cheaters whose affairs have nothing to do with relatedness to another, intimacy, sharing, pain or silence–They connect as conquest to bolster a well hidden but fragile ego. […]

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rules of fair fighting

11 Rules of Fair Fighting – Taming the Incredible Hulk

Rules of Fair Fighting and How To Make Yourself Heard By Sarah P. The incredible hulk—what does he have to do with anything? When I refer to the Incredible Hulk, I am referring to the extremely angry feelings that flood us when our unfaithful spouse has no insight into our feelings and refuses to acknowledge […]

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do open marriages work

Do Open Marriages Work?

By Sarah P.  Polyamorists claim open marriages are a good solution for the continued happiness of long-term happy marriages.  But do open marriages work? We have heard a lot from them recently—those people who practice polyamory. The movement, which was made popular in the 1970’s, is now rearing its ugly, leering head and wandering eyes […]

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why women cheat

For Betrayed Men: Why women cheat and leverage that you have if your wife cheated

  By Sarah P. This is Sarah’s second installment of her series on the leverage a betrayed spouse has after infidelity.  This post will address the leverage men have when their wives have been unfaithful.  (To read the first part of the two part series, you can  click here.) Most of the articles on this […]

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