By Sarah P. Not all negative communication patterns are alike. Sorting through the most harmful of these patterns has been one of the main areas of research for Drs. John and Julie Gottman. They have narrowed the four most harmful communication patterns down and refer to these patterns as The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, […]
We are launching a new series that we’ll run periodically called “You Decide” where you will provide your opinion on a fictional affair scenario. For each column, there will be a different scenario that has to do with infidelity. The purpose of this exercise is to define what infidelity means as well as to help […]
By Sarah P. This post is the third segment in the John Gottman’s Four Horsemen series. In this post, I will be discussing defensiveness. But, before we jump into the post, I would like for you to watch this video. It’s only about 5 minutes long so let’s dive in: I really like […]
We received an email the other day from a reader who writes the following: I have been in contact with you during the last few months. Your site continues to be a great resource for me as I have come to terms with what happened in my marriage. We are the couple […]
Whether you just found out about the affair or you are much further along in your recovery process, you have something in common… …You’d like things to get better and move closer to complete recovery, healing and a thriving marriage we all want. The first step is really understanding where you’re at currently. Take a […]
By Sarah P. This blog post is the continuation of a four-part series on Dr. John Gottman’s Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. In the first blog post in this series, I discussed criticism, which was the first of the Four Horsemen. In this post, I will discuss contempt and the role it plays in destroying […]
Let’s face it. Not every marriage is going to survive infidelity. But are you really ready for divorce? It‘s probably impossible to know what percentage of marriages end in divorce as a result of infidelity. But based on the reader surveys we’ve conducted over the years, the percentage of divorced and/or separated respondents hovers around […]
By Sarah P. To start off the New Year well, Doug, Linda, and I decided it was time to take a closer look at how to build more successful marriages. As of today, there is no better theory on how to have successful marriages than the theories of Drs. John and Julie Gottman. Often, […]
It’s actually been since early September since we’ve had an open discussion. So, we thought it’s a good time for Open Mic #26 ! In case you didn’t know, or are a new reader, this is where you guys call the shots and discuss the topics that you want to discuss. We know there must be […]
By Sarah P. The one question that people ask after their partner has had an affair is “why?” There are many answers to this question, but not enough information on what to do about it. In this blog post, I will talk about my own answer to the “why” and “what.” But first, let’s define […]
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This short guide tells you what you need to know to survive the affair, heal yourself and emerge on the other side a stronger person.
- It’s Tough To Stop an Emotional Affair March 15, 2011
- When the Other Woman Becomes the Wife September 6, 2012
- Real Reasons the Emotional Affair Happened February 2, 2012
- Staying After Cheating: Is It the Right Thing to Do? October 11, 2016
- How Does A Betrayed Spouse Heal from Cheating? July 5, 2013
- Open House Discussion August 28, 2013
- Does the Other Woman Play A Role In an Affair or Does the Blame Land Solely on the Cheating Husbands? YOU Decide July 19, 2016
- Discussion: Why Do Men and Women Cheat? October 5, 2011
- Danger Ahead – You Can Live Without Your Spouse, But Not Without Yourself May 23, 2017
- Darling You’ve Got to Let Me Know: Should I stay or should I go? – You Decide May 16, 2017
- Translating Affair Speak – Who Are You and What Have You Done With My Spouse? May 9, 2017
- Open ‘Mic’ Discussion #27 May 2, 2017
- Looks Like the Honeymoon Phase is Coming to an End April 25, 2017
- The Big Five: Gottman’s Communication Techniques to Talk about Infidelity April 18, 2017
- You Decide: Ron and Maria – Living in Affair Limbo April 11, 2017
- Is It Possible that Adult ADHD Contributed to an Affair? April 4, 2017
- Rachel: Thank you all for the great comments. It Is a goo...
- Sarah P.: I forgot to tell the best part of the story. Somet...
- TryingHard: Sarah-- that is a hilarious story of Karma at its...
- Sarah P.: Hi TFW and Trying, The comment was meant for bo...
- Sarah P.: Hi Trying, I think in the past it must have bee...
- Sarah P.: Rachel, Congratulations!! I love how God steppe...
- Sarah P.: TryingHard, Everything you said it true. And I ...
- Sarah P.: Shifting, It's always amazing to me how many w...
- Affair Signs
- After the Affair
- Catch a Cheating Spouse
- Dealing with Infidelity
- Emotional Affairs
- Ending an Affair
- Forgiving Infidelity
- Healing From Infidelity
- Marriage Building
- Our Emotional Affair Story
- Preventing Infidelity
- Save Your Marriage
- Self Help
- Sex and Marriage
- Surviving an Affair