affair partner

A Conversation with Kate

The other day I had a brief but interesting conversation with my sister-in-law regarding her relationship with her adult step children. In case you’re wondering, yes this is my brother-in-law’s wife (initially his affair partner), and the step kids I’m referring to are our nieces and nephew. It’s an extremely rare occasion that I’m ever […]

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details of the affair

A Betrayed Spouse Needs to Know the Details of the Affair

A betrayed spouse writes to his wife as to why it’s so important for him to know the details of the affair. We’ve addressed the importance of full disclosure by the cheater a few times.  In fact, Sarah P. wrote a nice article as recently as April.  But the other day we came across a wonderful letter […]

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your self-respect after an affair

Your Self-Respect After an Affair

After an affair strikes a relationship it is easy for each partner to lose their self-respect.  In this post, we’d like to use self-respect in the context of a person being able to hold himself/herself in esteem and believing that they are good and worthy of being treated well; having proper respect for oneself and […]

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Open ‘Mic’ Discussion #20

It’s that time again for you guys to take control of the topics that are most important to you. This is Open Mic #20 and we know there must be some things that are going on that you can either ask questions about, share your experiences – or maybe just do a little venting. Anyways, […]

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why men lie and cheat

The Real Reason Why Men Lie and Cheat

We’ve addressed shame a few times on this site but never from the standpoint that it is the reason why people cheat.  That’s probably because we never really considered that a person would cheat because of shame. Dr. D. Ivan Young provides us with his viewpoint that shame is the underlying reason for cheating and […]

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acceptance myths

The Five Myths that Surround Acceptance

By Savannah Ellis Unfortunately, most people in our culture have the wrong idea about what acceptance means. There are five primary myths that abound. I would like to describe each myth for you, and then tell you why it is a myth. Acceptance Myth #1: Acceptance Can Happen All at Once This is the #1 […]

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franconia ridge trail

Mount Infidelity – The Toughest Climb You’ll Ever Do

I realize that it’s very cliché to compare the struggles that go along with affair recovery to climbing a mountain, but after our experience on our vacation we discovered that the comparison to be even more appropriate. While in the White Mountains in New Hampshire we set off on a day-hike called the Franconia Ridge Loop […]

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nip flirting in the bud

Nip Flirting In the Bud Before It Happens (Again)

by Sarah P. I firmly believe that if a couple is to recover from an affair, there are certain behaviors that must be changed. There are other behaviors that must be dropped altogether if recovery is to be possible. The behavior that needs to go is flirting. I believe that extreme flirtation opens the door […]

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33 Observations from Two Weeks on the Road

It certainly is great to be back home after our two-week family getaway to New England.  After all, who doesn’t want to get back to 3000 emails, a foot high stack of mail, a ton of work to catch up on and a new school year just right around the corner?  Why would anyone want […]

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We’re Hitting the Road Again

Sunday we will be packing up our semi-trusty SUV we call ‘Old Betsy’ in preparation for hitting the road early Monday morning for a two week vacation in New England. Old Betsy is almost 15 years old and has about 202,000 miles on her.  She’s seen a good part of this country on the way […]

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