Let’s delve into your Christmas affair recovery and healing wish list during this holiday season.

Christmas affair recovery

Each year about this time we post a discussion about what you want most for the holidays.  And we’re not talking about that new car or diamond bracelet!  Rather, let’s delve into your Christmas affair recovery and healing wish list during the holiday season.

Christmas is in two days  and we’re sure that many of you are trying to get some last minute shopping done and are hoping for some holiday cheer. Yet at the same time you may be struggling…The affair triggers, rebuilding trust, ending the affair, etc., etc., etc.

This time of year can certainly provide you with a challenging roller coaster ride of emotions that run from one extreme to the other.  You may experience many emotions that you don’t normally experience.  Depression can be a real concern.

Most everyone has a holiday gift wish list that may include clothing, toys, gadgets, electronics, etc., but…

  • What is your wish list as it relates to affair recovery and healing?
  • What is the best gift that your spouse can ‘give’ you?  – Perhaps…To end the affair.  True remorse.  To talk about things more.   A safe environment for trust to build. Transparency.
  • What gift for healing can you ‘give’ yourself?  – Forgiveness. Self-esteem.  Inner strength.  Physical strength.  Control over the painful thoughts. Therapy…?
  • In a nutshell, what are the top things that you can think of that will help you in your own journey towards healing from an affair – especially during the holidays?

Heck, why don’t we also expand this into what you wish for as we head into the New Year!  Any recovery and healing resolutions you’d care to share?

For those of you who might be further along in your recovery journey, we’d certainly would appreciate it if you could share any advice or wisdom to help others during the holiday season.

Please respond to each other in the comments section.


Linda & Doug

    4 replies to "Open Discussion – What’s On Your Christmas Affair Recovery Wish List?"

    • Nearly Normal

      Hi all.

      I am having some depression that happens to coincide with the season, but doesn’t really have to do with it. Some communication with my wife turned a bit hurtful, and I am having some trouble getting over that.

      Also, I wish for more open communication, which mainly means me speaking up more often. I have to give myself credit for doing better, but also I have much room for improvement.

      I have recently had a few vivid nightmares of my wife doing things which, to be fair, she has not done in years. If that could stop happening, that would be just great.

      Hope you all (even if you don’t believe in Christmas) have as joyful a time of year as possible under your circumstances

      • Wendy

        Near Normal…I too have depression this time of year because it’s the anniversary of our dday. One year ago on Christmas I discovered a slew of texts on my husband’s phone and the last 12 months have been hell for me. He’s trying to make changes and help me through this but I’m having a hard time getting past it. Christmas just takes me back to a very difficult time.

    • Debbie

      I wish that my husband would be able to open up to me and share his thoughts and feelings more. This has been a problem our whole marriage. I also wish that he can truly understand why he had his affair on a deeper level. So far all he has are excuses and rationalizations.

    • Hopeful

      I wish my H could be more open and talk to me more. He has done quite a bit the past year to change his ways and help me through this. I do however wish he could do more. Realize that the pain won’t just disappear but that I would heal faster if he did more. His silence scares in that he might think everything is okay and forget about the pain he caused.

      I also wish I had more control over my thaughts. I get caught up in ‘conversations’ with myself…lol…and I wish I can stop thinking about that tramp. The thaughts are definately less and has less of an effect on me, but it just needs to stop. I hate myself when I think about her and sometimes still compare myself. And I know my H doesn’t think about her or his affair anymore, so it upsets me that my memories and thaughts have to haunt me.

      But, this Christmas has definately been better than last year. On Christmas day I didn’t have one thaught about the affair which was very refreshing.

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