I-90Sunday we will be packing up our semi-trusty SUV we call ‘Old Betsy’ in preparation for hitting the road early Monday morning for a two week vacation in New England.

Old Betsy is almost 15 years old and has about 202,000 miles on her.  She’s seen a good part of this country on the way to various baseball tournaments and dance competitions over the years, but she’s been in semi-retirement for the last three years, rarely leaving the driveway except for a quick errand or the occasional kayak trip.

We’re taking her because this trip is a bit different than the last one we took two years ago.  That time it was just Linda and I, whereas this one will also include our three adult kids and our 80 pound dog.

We will also be loaded down with camping equipment, kayaks, mountain bikes and perhaps climbing gear, so if you happen to see a black Suburban heading east on I-90 that looks somewhat like the Griswolds from the movie National Lampoon’s Vacation, that would be us.

 

The main destination of our trip is going to be Acadia National Park where we will be tent camping for 7 days, stopping in Portland for a day on the way.  From there we plan to hit the White Mountains in New Hampshire with the ultimate goal of climbing Mt. Washington.  Then we head south for a few days of beach camping in Cape Cod and wrap things up with a brief stay in Boston.

With any trip there are always some potential things that make you a little nervous.  This trip is no different…

  • Can ‘Old Betsy’ make it? Nothing worse than breaking down a thousand miles from home.
  • It’s been a few years since we’ve traveled as an entire family, and we’ve never done it for two weeks. Will our kids’ habits drive us insane?  Will I lose it and toss their cell phones (which are often glued to their faces) in the ocean?
  • Will the crazy summer weather follow us to Maine resulting in really crappy, wet, cool days and nights?
  • Will we be blown off the face of Mt. Washington? It’s known to have some high winds and generally crappy weather.
  • Can our daughters survive “Bear Week” in Provincetown, MA without being permanently scarred? (Great timing on our part, BTW!)
  • Leaving Linda’s parents at home without her being able to check in on them. They’re in their 80’s and starting to be more dependent on her.
  • Will Linda and I (especially me) survive not having sex for two weeks? (It’s kind of impossible when the kids are in the same tent!)
See also  Open 'Mic' Discussion #30 - What's On Your Mind Today?

I just finished up a crazy stint where I was working 16 hour days for 8 of the last 11 days.  I slept very little and ate like crap during that time, so as a result, my brain is mush and I feel exhausted.  I thought about leaving you with a super post before we left, but to be honest, I just didn’t feel like it, and Linda is busy with her typical pre-vacation hysteria; shopping, cleaning, organizing, packing, etc. 

With that said, please use this post as your sounding board for anything you want to discuss or comment on.  Basically, just like our ‘Open Mic’ discussions.  It’s going to be the last post for a couple weeks so use it as you wish.

We will be taking our laptop and IPad and will be checking in on occasion to approve any comments that need approving and/or take care of any service related issues.  (So don’t get in a tizzy if we don’t get back to you right away!)  I’m assuming wi-fi service will be plentiful in most areas up there, but I could be way off base on that too.

Additionally, since one of the goals of this trip is to unplug as much as possible, there won’t be any Higher Healing updates or mentoring sessions until we get back, and I doubt if any emails will be responded to. 

So we’re off to have a wicked good time and experience some of those famous grinders, frappes, chowder and lobster rolls…Not to mention some of the best outdoors that this country has to offer.

Take care and tootle-loo!

See also  Discussion: What is Your Support Group After the Affair?

 

    33 replies to "We’re Hitting the Road Again"

    • Lynsey

      Have a great trip Doug & Linda! You’ll love Acadia..be sure to get up early and view the sunrise from the top! Portland has some awesome microbreweries too. If you’ll be passing through Vermont, I can give you an insiders view on what to see, do, and where to eat, find excellent beers, etc. Again, have a wonderful time.

      • Doug

        Thanks Lynsey. No Vermont this time around unfortunately. We do indeed plan to get up and check out the sunrise on top of Cadillac Mountain at least once though. I’ve heard Portland is a cool city with some good breweries and you know I will be sampling what they got!

    • Tryinghard

      You guys have a great time. No sex? Two weeks? Bears? I’m just praying no one gets thrown to those bears!

      Don’t worry about the blog. We will take care of it! BWAHAHAHA.

      • Doug

        I’m sure you will! What is that saying…When the cat’s away… 😉

        • Tryinghard

          Exactly!! I’ll be nice. Oh who am I kidding, no I won’t. Have fun you two crazy kids.

      • Strengthrequired

        Have a wonderful time Doug and Linda, come back safe and sound.

        Th, don’t we always look after this place when left to our own devices. Lol
        I think we even seem to chat more….

    • Shifting Impressions

      Yup, those “family vacations” can have their moments…….you’ll probably need a vacation after your vacation but hey, that’s what family is all about.

      So nice to know that Tryinghard will be looking after the blog…..cough cough!!!

      Safe travels….have fun.

    • TryingHard

      LOL Shifting Impressions. Can’t do it by myself. You have to hold up your end too:) we have to do it for Doug and Linda blog:)

    • TryingHard

      Yes we do SR!!!! It’s kind of our patriotic duty!!!

    • Rachel

      Ok so basically I need this block to chat with someone at 3:00am eastern standard time.
      Menopause? Idk it just drives me crazy being awake. I can’t shut down this brain of mine.
      Plus it will be fun chatting with all of you in person . Well kind of.
      We’ll have to keep our names so we won’t get confused.
      When is Doug and Linda coming back? Two weeks?? Oh geez that’s so long!!!!
      We are his children right???? And he didn’t invite us to go.

      • Strengthrequired

        Rachel we are the black sheep of the family…
        Please look after yourself, I’m not looking forward to menopause…

    • gizfield

      Sounds like a great trip. I’d love to go up that way sometime. Take care and have fun!

    • Rachel

      Strength,
      Menopause not so fun. Tossing and turning all night, the absolute worse.

      • Tryinghard

        Ah the wonderful ness of menopause and peri menopause. Actually since I’ve been through the worst of both I’ve come to realize that menopause is just your body’s way of screaming “gird your loins ladies, life as you knew it is about to change!”

        Not only do we get to experience the very real physical symptoms of losing our hormones with night sweats, sleepless nights, unwanted weight gain, dry skin etc. yep there ain’t a lotion out their to revive your dry skin. I don’t care what that bottle says. But it also coincides with all the other lovely emotional and personal loses. Children leaving, job transitions, friends retiring and moving, parents dying and of course husbands going through some level of a mid life crisis and for some divorce. It’s a lovely experience all around. Not only is your body saying “yeah ok as a female you are now worthless cause you can no longer reproduce so what good are you”. Ha society doesn’t mind reinforcing that message. All those facial lines, lack of subtle skin, saggy arms, gray hair yeah that becomes repulsive to most. Anything we may have to contribute to society is now negated because well we are old, repulsed by the media and derided for not covering that shit up! We become invisible to the point where many go to crazy extremes with Botox, fillers and painful, expensive surgeries all in an effort to be a little more relevant.

        Men go through physical change as well but that is to be admired. Graying temples, a little bit of weight gain, they are admired for their great experience as they age. Their looks don’t matter. When men get wrinkles it’s called smile lines, it’s charming. Women get crows feet!!! Just watch during the election all the criticisms of Hillary Clintons personal appearance will play. I don’t care what your political affiliation is or isn’t. Irrelevant criticism about her personal appearance is what will be discussed and not so for the male contenders.

        So those sleepless nights may start with the hormones waking you up while screaming “bye bye”, but all the other of life’s lovely vicissitudes during this life changing phase of your life is what’s keeping you up. Letting you play and replay all those crazy thoughts.

        In case I’ve scared any of you lovelies that haven’t experienced this wonderful place in life, I’m sorry. This is one part of life my mother didn’t warn me about. Consider yourself warned my young sisters.

    • gizfield

      Maybe I’m an exception, cause menopause didn’t really seem that bad to me, lol. But then again, I’m on a different schedule from everyone else. Lost both my parents around 30, and a husband at 40. Then, having a baby at 45. I can’t do anything at the normal time.

      Tmi warning ahead. I had relatively normal periods, except they got shorter in length, until I was about 51 1/2. It literally just stopped without warning and I never had another one. Maybe it was the stress of the big flood in my city. I didn’t even notice for a while.

      The only advice I can give is that this is a finite stage in your life and also that it is totally normal and not to be feared. There’s a wonderful land of no periods, no birth control or pregnancy scares, and really, not giving a damn what other people think over the horizon.

      Just stay active, eat well, do things you enjoy. Investigate natural health remedies. For sleep issues, I buy some cheap diphenhydramine tablets that are 25 mg. The usual dosage is 2 tablets but I only take one. It’s very helpful occasionally. And after a lifetime of worrying about your looks, it is really nice to realize you don’t really care. Does happiness in life really come from sexiness? It is jeans, t shirts, and Birkenstocks for me all the way and I love it 🙂

    • TryingHard

      Birks, tees, and jeans are very much in fashion Giz. I gave up worrying about what people thought of me a loooonnnngg time before menopause!

    • Strengthrequired

      Thanks for the advice my lovelies, not sure I’m ready for the next stage in life, hopefully it doesn’t hit me too badly, after all trying hard, husband already had his affair, making me feel insignificant, and guess what she was only a few years younger than me. So if it doesn’t hit me first, it will hit her first. If it does hit me first, then she is not long after me.
      I agree with what you said about the men being looked upon differently as they age.

      Giz, jeans and shirts here too, what ever makes me feel comfortable. Thanks for the tips.

      Rachel, I toss all the time too, yet I’ve been tossing and turning ever since dday, just can’t seem to have a good nights sleep.

    • Rachel

      I use to worry about what people think all the time. My ex mother in law was famous for saying ” what will people think”? Well I wonder what people are thinking now with her loser son?
      So the ex is not happy. Not happy with his life. Well well this isn’t news as we told him he wouldn’t be happy.
      My son has dreams that we get back together. I guess that is every child’s dream when their parents divorce. I told my son that it won’t be happening.
      Financially things would be easier, but the trust issue is gone. His words about me stick in my head. I am happy. I have found peace most days. I love my home and it’s mine.
      I can do whatever I chose to do to it.
      I am a completely different person now.
      He said someday he and his sole mate will be together in the future. I couldn’t go through the waiting period of someday.
      I deserve better.

    • Heartbroken

      I too am going through menopause. My husbands emotional affair with someone 15 years younger couldn’t have come at a worse time! The hot flashes are the worst! Nothing like sweating profusely for absolutely no reason, 10 times a day, while trying to rekindle the spark in your marriage. Lol

    • Doug

      We’re baaaccckkk! We rolled in last night after a little 14 hour drive from Boston and are playing major catch up right now (Almost 3000 emails! Probably 2800 of them are spam).

      We’ve been out of the world news loop and this may not be news to most of you but I just saw that Ashley Madison got hacked and it’s members info is being help hostage. This excerpt is from a website called “The Stir”

      “A group of hackers called “The Impact Team” claims to have infiltrated the site that encourages extramarital affairs and says it’s in possession of the company’s entire client database. D’oh!

      What made these cyberattackers decide to go after the site whose tagline is: “Life is short. Have an affair”? Turns out they don’t believe the company’s claim that it will permanently erase a client’s record for $19.

      Unless the website is taken down immediately, The Impact Team says it’s ready to expose those 37.5 million customers — and their sexual fantasies….”

      I bet there’s a bunch of people sweating things out right now!

      • TryingHard

        Woot Woot Doug and Linda are back!!! They didn’t get eaten by the bears!!!!

        OMG Ashley Madison!! I say HACKERS ROCK!!!!

        • Strengthrequired

          Welcome back doug and Linda, hope your trip away was one of the best you have ever had.

          Th, doug, I’m still trying to understand why anyone would ever want to create such a website, that encourages affairs. All those members cheating on their spouses, all those betrayed spouses who aren’t even aware, how hurt they are going to be. I’m sure there are a few of those members who are sweating like crazy. It’s makes you even more aware now just how many cheaters are out there. How many are out there that don’t cheat on those they love? It’s a sad reality.

    • TryingHard
    • Strengthrequired

      Th, thanks for sharing, it was a very good article. In a way I hope these cheaters are exposed, but I do worry about all of those spouses and families of the cheaters, how hurt they are going to be, there will be so many, wide scale. Yet hopefully anyone that has been considering cheating takes notice of this, and realises it is just wrong.

      I asked my husband today after our discussion with the am hacking, ” if a friend of his told him that he was cheating on his wife, what would he say? Would he tell his friend about his experience and advise him to think carefully? He answered he would advise him to stop, let him know that nothing good comes of it, but he wouldn’t talk much about it either, in case his friend became offended.

      Have any of you ever asked your Cs this question? If so what was their response? Especially with them knowing the damage it actually causes now that they have been there, done that.

      What about you doug, what would you say to a friend of yours if they told you they were cheating on their wife?

      • Doug

        SR, I would certainly tell my friend about my experiences, the pain it caused and advise him not to do it (or to stop). I would also tell him to get on this site or any other affair site and read the experiences of others who have lived through the betrayal or have lived with the consequences of their actions.

        • Strengthrequired

          Doug, I’m glad you would say something, great answer.

        • antiskank

          Welcome back Doug and Linda. I’m glad you had a good holiday, now back to the old grind. We all missed your valuable input! It’s almost like when the life of the party leaves and everybody goes into their corners and stops talking!

          Great answer by the way!!

          On another note, I can’t get a song out of my head. I’m sure everyone has heard the song “Honey I’m Good” by Andy Grammer. The video is also really great. It’s not my usual type of music but is very catchy and puts a smile on my face every time I hear it. I got my CH to watch and listen; he agreed that he should have acted that way! Such a good message:)

    • TryingHard

      OK so guess what happened?? Last night my husband got a friend request on FB from an old college girlfriend. Yes he “dated” her when he and I were in a relationship. Yep that’s when his cheating started when I was 17 and he was 20. I broke up with him then had loads of boys calling me for dates since he was out of the picture. Made him nuts!! He came begging back and of fucking course I let him!!!!

      So fast forward 42 years later she sends him a friend request!! I was pissed. They have nothing and no one in common. Actually he’s totally innocent in all this. I saw the red friend request and asked him “who’s friending you?” He didn’t even know how to open it so I did it for him. I asked “who’s Jane Doe” and then I saw where she went to high school and college. He said I have no idea and he was serious. I said “Oh I know who she is”. Well SOB I think he was flattered!! I was pissed. Of course he took defense and said he didn’t send her a friend request and he didn’t know how she found him. He’s telling the truth, he is NOT FB knowledgeable. Anyway not much discussion went on other than my saying I should have dumped his ass back then!

      Well this morning I thought I will be go to hell. So I sent her a message asking her why on earth she wanted to friend someone with whom she had nothing and no one in common other than he was a short term college boyfriend and that perhaps her husband would like to know she’s reaching out to my husband. I said I suggest you NEVER try this again.

      And guess what? I’m glad I did it. There is NO doubt what she was up to and I cut her short in her tracks. Yeah that’s all I need is for the two of them to reminisce about college days. I doubt she’ll have the balls to send me a message back. They never do!!!

      Thanks just needed to blow off steam!

    • Strengthrequired

      Good on you th, honestly I can’t stand fb. Probably just for that reason. All the exes wanting to find each other because their life turned out like cr@p, so let’s find so and so, because we really liked each other so maybe we can again, because of well we were soul mates….
      I’m glad you got her to back off, my husband would have been flattered too, even after everything, just another ego boost.
      What did your husband say when you told him you should have dumped his sorry ass back then?

    • antiskank

      Way to go TH! Send her packing!

      Between Facebook and Ashley Madison, the opportunities for affairs are limitless apparently. With somewhere around 37 million on AM, and the millions that just find affair partners the old fashioned way (at work or a bar, etc) are we the only ones left that are not having affairs?

      • Strengthrequired

        Antis lank, I have to wonder why anyone gets married anymore, especially if most of them want someone else on the side.
        If they want to play around, don’t get married, don’t make a mockery of marriage vows, it’s a sacred vow made between two people, in the eyes of God and should be honoured. Either be willing to honour your vows or get divorced, or just don’t get married in the first place if your always going to be on the look out for someone better.
        It’s a shame, a real shame.

        • Rachel

          I feel the same way, Strength!

    • Tabs

      TH-

      Job well done!! My CH would have been flattered, too. So flattered that he would’ve responded. Unfortunately for me, my CH is very FB savvy. He used to message through FB all the time. I got to see every gory detail because he failed to clear the history.

      Does anybody know if any AM info was ever released? I’m thinking I better look for every known alias my CH has ever used.

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