When I found out she had moved in immediately and found out they had been having an affair for nearly a year, I couldn't believe it. But, that was not the worst part. The worst part was trauma that knocked me off my feet.
My mind was in shock. My body was in shock. My heart was broken.
I had absolutely NO WARNING that would have given me an idea of what I was to experience that night. I knew that my partner was breaking up and that he did not want to leave the house, but that is all I knew.
At the time, he swore to me there was no one else – he even swore on the Bible itself that there was no one else. (It has occurred to me since then that asking someone to swear on the Bible is a terrible idea because Bibles cannot talk.) A person who is a selfish liar thinks the Bible is just another book and often feels proud of himself for being able to use this manipulation tool. Honest people take swearing on the Bible seriously; dishonest people do not.
Prior to this experience, my partner had never been emotionally or physically violent. Even up until the day he broke up with me, we had what others said was a wonderful relationship. Our friends saw us as “that couple” who had found true love and would never be torn apart. I too had believed that.
So, not only did I have to come to terms with the fact that my partner had beaten and raped me because another woman wanted to move in, I had to come to terms with the fact that the relationship I thought I had was an enormous lie.
Then it got worse….
It occurred to me that I could have an STD. It occurred to me that I could have AIDS. I went to my doctor, whom I had seen for several years, and let him know what happened. I told him my partner had been having an affair and I wanted every STD test available. My doctor agreed that this was necessary.
It took a little while to get all the results back. My stomach was in knots waiting for the AIDS test. When my doctor said I did NOT have AIDS, an enormous burden was lifted.
But, I still had to keep sitting down… he had very bad news.
He told me that I had cervical cancer and my ability to have children, along with my life, was in danger.
I did not understand.
I had assumed cervical cancer was a random cancer that happened to women after menopause. However, my doctor informed me that cervical cancer was a sexually transmitted disease.
No one had ever told me that before. My head was swimming and spinning.
The doctor stated that since he had performed my annual check-ups and they were always clean, he was 99% certain that I had gotten a type of fast-growing cervical cancer from my partner. My doctor recommended immediate surgery and removed a large part of my cervix.
The shock was nearly too much to take. After all, in how many ways can you ruin the life of another human being?