We wanted to share with you the results of our recent survey. We had a tremendous response and we greatly appreciate those who took the time to give us their two cents. We thought the results were somewhat interesting and give a pretty good indication of where most of you are struggling in your affair recovery.
The question was asked: What issue or fear are you struggling with most right now with respect to recovering from infidelity?
In order of highest to lowest, here are the results:
Rebuilding Trust 68.3%
Dealing with obsessive thoughts 57.4%
Dealing with anger and other emotions 49.2%
Forgiveness 42.1%
Getting your partner to talk about the affair 39.3%
Preventing further infidelity 38.3%
Restoring your self-esteem 35.5%
Restoring sex and intimacy 24.0%
Other 19.7%
Getting your partner to end the affair 15.3%
Some of the struggles mentioned in the “Other” category were:
“Getting him to tell me how he feels now, 6 months later, about what happened.”
“When he talks to me…..how did he REALLY feel…not just patronizing me so he doesn’t hurt me.”
“Becoming a couple again.”
“The idea that my wife will always carry a torch for her ex-boyfriend…”
“Getting revenge!!”
“Knowing if my wife is going to recommit to our marriage or not.”
“Understanding, from my spouse, why the affair happened. A cheaters perspective.”
“Repairing the rift this has caused with family.”
“Anger towards affair partner. Feelings of betrayal, hurt & pain.”
“Getting husband to admit the affair and stop calling me insecure and paranoid.”
“Dealing with thoughts of why am I staying and is this really going to work. I will never feel the same (completely loved / safe )with my spouse again.”
“Dealing with feeling safe after (different than traditional trust) my wife’s affair and the improvement in her mental health…”
“Deciding whether to stay or move forward on my own…”
“I am struggling with all of the above issues.”
One main reason to conduct this survey was to determine how we can best help you. We are creating a book on infidelity, probably more like a workshop actually, to address your needs. Whether we call it a workshop or a book, we will be addressing your most important struggles in great depth.
We will be providing the end product in both written and audio format, with worksheets, expert interviews, and our own experiences – successes and failures. It’s quite a project and we’re very excited about it.
Unlike other infidelity books that are out there, our workshop/book will be broken down into modules. You will have the option of obtaining only the modules that you need, or you can obtain them all as a package. We thought this way if someone is struggling only with forgiveness, for example, then they can get just that module and not worry about all the other modules that may be of no importance to them.
The first module will be on Rebuilding Trust, and will delve into several different trust-related issues. Issues such as trusting yourself, the betrayed spouse trusting the cheater again, the cheating spouse trusting the betrayed spouse, etc.
If you’re interested in getting advanced notice once the module is completed, please leave your name and email below and we will notify you first and offer you a significant price discount. We haven’t decided on the cost yet, but we assure you it will be very affordable, whether you are getting a single module or the whole package.
Thanks again for your help!
Here’s the notification sign-up form
1 Response to "Affair Recovery Survey Results"
I wish I could have voted for more than one. All of them are areas where I am having troubles. Of course, when you just find out about the affair, all of them are just as important.