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Hedonic Adaptation in relationships

Neither the Supermodel Nor the Housewife Wins: Hedonic Adaptation in Relationships and How it Could Play a Role in Infidelity

By Sarah P. What do men like Arnold Schwarzenegger, Robin Williams, Ben Affleck, Jude Law, and Hugh Grant have in common? On the other side, what do women like Adrianna Lima, Christie Brinkley, Shania Twain, Jennifer Garner, and Liz Hurley have in common? All of these people are bound together by a commonality that has […]

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rebuilding a marriage

Make This D-Day Your Last – What Works in Rebuilding a Marriage after Infidelity

Making this D-Day your last has three key components or considerations. Making this D-Day your last requires activity and honest assessment on your part. I will first discuss the elements that help in rebuilding a marriage after infidelity. If those don’t work, you can still stay if you choose to. However, there are times when […]

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nip flirting in the bud

Nip Flirting In the Bud Before It Happens (Again)

by Sarah P. I firmly believe that if a couple is to recover from an affair, there are certain behaviors that must be changed. There are other behaviors that must be dropped altogether if recovery is to be possible. The behavior that needs to go is flirting. I believe that extreme flirtation opens the door […]

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finding meaning in the affair

Stirring Things Up – Finding Meaning in the Affair

“It’s time to move on.” “I know I screwed up and I know I won’t do it again.” “Digging up all these past wounds doesn’t do either of us any good.” Have you heard (or said) any – or all – of these phrases in the past? Of course you as the betrayed also want […]

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preventing an emotional affair

How to Avoid Cheating on Your Spouse

So here you are, happy in a loving, committed relationship and yet at every turn there is temptation. There’s the attractive assistant manager in the office down the hall, the client who always seems to be flirting with you or an attractive member of the opposite sex that approaches you when you are out on […]

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heal after an affair

Don’t Wait 6 Years to Admit You Have Marriage Problems

Because we have this blog, I often find myself observing and analyzing people in normal situations, perhaps making a few assumptions, and then sharing it with you guys in an effort to make a point.  I had another opportunity to do this last Saturday at Linda’s 35th high school reunion. Nothing earth-shattering occurred but I […]

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prevent another affair

Whose Job Is It To Prevent Another Affair?

From the moment of your first discovery that your partner is cheating (or cheated in the past), your response makes a huge difference. What you choose to do strongly influences whether or not the two of you will be able to pick up the broken pieces and repair your relationship. This doesn’t mean you can’t […]

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faithful marriage

Principles That Ensure a Harmonious, Sensual, and Faithful Marriage

by Sarah P. Tips From Modern Orthodoxy Note: I belong to an inter-faith family, Christianity and reformed Judaism. Both religions dwell harmoniously in our home because we focus on commonalities instead of differences. We have a couple of friends from the modern Orthodox community and there are things we have come to admire about modern […]

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Fingers crossed

Should You Stay Or Should You Go? Know the 9 Common Traits of A Serial Cheater So You Can Decide

By Sarah P. Note: Recently, one of the readers asked whether or not there was a way to know if a man who cheated would be a repeat offender.  After thinking about it, I put together this post about traits that set serial cheaters apart from “one hit wonders.”  Though this is written using a […]

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denial after the affair

Discussion – What Would Have Prevented the Affair?

Thanks to everyone who joined in on the discussion from last week.  It was a great response and we appreciate it – and you guys – very much. One of the comments was from an ex-CS who has contributed quite a bit on this site and has obviously made great strides since ending the affair. […]

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