School started back up a couple of weeks ago and I’ve been running around all crazy-like ever since. I made the decision at the end of last year to move to a different grade level, so now I’m teaching first graders again – after about 20 years of teaching third graders. To say this has […]
It seems that most betrayed spouses never really get a true heartfelt, genuine apology after the affair from the unfaithful spouse. Sure, they may get the standard “I’m sorry” but it seems as though they usually hear those two words much too often as the cheater continues their lies and poor behavior. This post is […]
By Mel Faith Shame and suffering are linked, as are forgiveness and health. On a purely emotional level, this has been accepted for generations – but psychological science is beginning to prove that the ability to forgive (both others and oneself) can have a profound impact upon one’s health and wellbeing. Shame and guilt are […]
Quite often I correspond with betrayed spouses who claim that their spouse is not helping in the healing process because of the guilt that they feel as a result of their affair. This simple 4-step process may help with this issue. While searching for appropriate content for the Higher Healing area the other day, I […]
An extremely important component of forgiveness after infidelity is effectively reframing the story that you tell yourself. This is also related to the concept of self-talk. Each time we witness an event or think a thought, our mind automatically constructs a story around each thought or event. The story that our mind constructs can be […]
When our spouse betrays us with another person, the sadness, grief, and negativity that we feel threatens to swallow us whole. Even though this is a normal experience, it’s not an experience that we should allow to take over our entire lives. Whether or not we choose to stay with our betraying spouse has nothing […]
For the last few days I’ve been reading a book that was recommended to me called “Let it Go” by T.D. Jakes. The book is primarily about forgiveness, though in one chapter he addresses an issue that always seems to be a struggle for our readers – rebuilding trust after infidelity. One of the points […]
There are many hurdles to cross when trying to recover from an affair. One of the biggest and most difficult to overcome is the letting go of resentment. What is resentment? My good buddy Wikipedia says that… Resentment (also called ranklement or bitterness) is the experience of a negative emotion (anger or hatred, for instance) […]
Last week we wrote a post about David Lieberman’s 10 phases of forgiveness and making peace with another. I was particularly interested in phase 7, which is restoring the sense of balance to the relationship after an emotional affair. In this phase, Lieberman states that it’s important for the cheater to let the betrayed know […]
As usual, I have about four books that I’m simultaneously reading. One of them, “Make Peace With Anyone” by David J. Lieberman, Ph.D., offers some suggestions regarding forgiveness for infidelity that I wanted to share with you. Dr. Lieberman offers a ten phase approach to gain forgiveness after someone has clearly violated the trust, respect […]
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This short guide tells you what you need to know to survive the affair, heal yourself and emerge on the other side a stronger person.
- It’s Tough To Stop an Emotional Affair March 15, 2011
- When the Other Woman Becomes the Wife September 6, 2012
- Real Reasons the Emotional Affair Happened February 2, 2012
- How Does A Betrayed Spouse Heal from Cheating? July 5, 2013
- Open House Discussion August 28, 2013
- Does the Other Woman Play A Role In an Affair or Does the Blame Land Solely on the Cheating Husbands? YOU Decide July 19, 2016
- Discussion: Why Do Men and Women Cheat? October 5, 2011
- How It All Started December 18, 2009
- Save Yourself: You Can Recover From Infidelity Even If Your Partner Is Not an Active Participant September 20, 2016
- Open ‘Mic’ Discussion #25 September 13, 2016
- At the Heart of Attachment: How to Use Empathy to Communicate Effectively For On-Going Recovery September 6, 2016
- Our 1000th Post! August 30, 2016
- You Have Come A Long Way, Baby! – Female Gender Roles as an Attempt to Curtail Male Infidelity August 23, 2016
- Spouse Poachers: When it’s open season on your husband, you need to have a plan August 16, 2016
- 10 Things that Can Help Build Your Self-Esteem Post D-day August 9, 2016
- When Your Husband Marries the Other Woman – What Happens? August 2, 2016
- Sarah P.: Hi Shifting, Thank you for you concern-- it was...
- Sarah P.: Hi Rachel, I am seeing some kind of pattern. Many...
- Sarah P.: Hi Hopeful, Your therapist sounds like a great gu...
- Sarah P.: Hi TFW, I am sorry to hear that your mother-in-la...
- TheFirstWife: I heard from other in laws that was the reason. He...
- Shifting Impressions: Sarah Your story is heart breaking....thank you f...
- 2nd-time hurt: 9 years ago , I already forgiven my husband's 20 ...
- Hopeful: Sarah, yes so true that there is not a significant...
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