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Forgiveness Is the Best Gift You Can Give Yourself

Forgiveness Is the Best Gift You Can Give Yourself

When our spouse betrays us with another person, the sadness, grief, and negativity that we feel threatens to swallow us whole. Even though this is a normal experience, it’s not an experience that we should allow to take over our entire lives. Whether or not we choose to stay with our betraying spouse has nothing […]

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Trust After Infidelity – Rebuilding on What’s Left

For the last few days I’ve been reading a book that was recommended to me called “Let it Go” by T.D. Jakes. The book is primarily about forgiveness, though in one chapter he addresses an issue that always seems to be a struggle for our readers – rebuilding trust after infidelity. One of the points […]

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Letting Go of Resentment

There are many hurdles to cross when trying to recover from an affair.  One of the biggest and most difficult to overcome is the letting go of resentment. What is resentment? My good buddy Wikipedia says that… Resentment (also called ranklement or bitterness) is the experience of a negative emotion (anger or hatred, for instance) […]

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The Cheater Needs to Remember the Emotional Affair Wasn’t So Great After All

Last week we wrote a post about David Lieberman’s 10 phases of forgiveness and making peace with another.  I was particularly interested in phase 7, which is restoring the sense of balance to the relationship after an emotional affair.  In this phase, Lieberman states that it’s important for the cheater to let the betrayed know […]

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Ten Phases to Gain Forgiveness for Infidelity

As usual, I have about four books that I’m simultaneously reading.  One of them, “Make Peace With Anyone” by David J. Lieberman, Ph.D., offers some suggestions regarding forgiveness for infidelity that I wanted to share with you. Dr. Lieberman offers a ten phase approach to gain forgiveness after someone has clearly violated the trust, respect […]

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Dave Carder on Why Men Stay After an Affair

Last Thursday I wrote a post about how I still felt the pain from the thoughts of why Doug really decided to stay in our marriage.  Today I wanted to follow up on that a bit and share with you some wonderful information from one of our favorite authors, Dave Carder.  Dave is the author […]

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Four Approaches to Forgiving Infidelity

Forgiving infidelity is a another difficult part of the affair recovery process.  In the book “How Can I Forgive You?” by Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D. the author describes four different approaches to forgiveness:  Cheap Forgiveness, Refusing to Forgive, Acceptance and Genuine Forgiveness.  While the second two are more flexible in nature, according to the author, […]

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Forgiving Infidelity and Making a Commitment

Some of the best information that exists on this site comes from the readers through the comments that they make.  I was doing some research yesterday for my book I want to write, and re-read a series of comments related to forgiving infidelity.  I thought what this one reader said was wonderful, and thought it […]

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forgiving the emotional affair

My Process for Forgiving the Emotional Affair

Linda shares her process for forgiving Doug after his affair. Recently,  Doug and I recorded a session for the Affair Recovery Group where we wrapped up the topic of forgiveness after the affair by sharing some of our own experiences and opinions with respect to this very important topic. A question came up where I […]

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Our Own Emotional Affair

Lately I have been putting much thought into my long journey to forgiveness after Doug’s emotional affair, and trying to figure out why it was so difficult to reach.  As a result, I began reconstructing our affair recovery and analyzing each step. It is ironic how I can now remember the details and the activities […]

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