November 2010 Archives - Emotional Affair Journey

The Lack of ‘Real Love’ is the Real Cause of Infidelity

Posted on 30. Nov, 2010 by Doug.

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Last night I was reading “Real Love in Marriage” by Greg Baer, M.D. (in between plays on Monday Night football, no less) and noted a section pertaining to the cause of infidelity that I felt was interesting and would be good to share to our readers. The concept of “real love” is explained in great [...]

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Affair Withdrawal: A Difficult Hurdle

Posted on 29. Nov, 2010 by Doug.

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We had Thanksgiving dinner at my in-laws last week, and my brother-in-law joined us as well. As many of you may recall, he was himself recently embroiled in a physical affair, ended it, and decided to work on his marriage. At one point during the evening, he pulled Linda and me aside to show us [...]

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Why My Emotional Affair Relationship Would Never Have Succeeded

Posted on 26. Nov, 2010 by Doug.

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Statistics state that just around 25% of relationships that start as marital affairs will succeed. While I was in my emotional affair, I would have thought that this statistic was a bunch of crap. I would have simply dismissed it while in my “affair fog,” since I felt at the time that my relationship with [...]

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Be Thankful!

Posted on 25. Nov, 2010 by Doug.

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As a follow up to yesterday’s discussion topic, and since it’s Thanksgiving here in the U.S., I wanted to change things up a bit. Sometimes we get so caught up in all of our own situations that we forget about all the things we should be thankful for. I found this on the web and [...]

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Discussion: What are You Thankful For?

Posted on 24. Nov, 2010 by Doug.

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Happy Thanksgiving Eve! The holiday season has sneaked up on us again this year as usual, but both Linda and I really do love this time of year. We always have. However, the holidays can be a tough time for those suffering from the effects of infidelity, but we were hoping that we could maybe [...]

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Why Some Marital Affairs Last Longer Than Others

Posted on 23. Nov, 2010 by Linda.

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Many authors and researchers state that most marital affairs usually die on their own. There are several reasons for this. For instance, the excitement and infatuation wear away and the affair becomes more trouble than it is worth. Or the infidelity may be brought out into the open and the affair partners are forced to [...]

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A Better Way to Get Them to End The Affair

Posted on 22. Nov, 2010 by Linda.

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One of the biggest mistakes that I made upon discovery was reading materials about how to have a good marriage. My behaviors at the time were based this information that I had gained, as I tried to do everything a “perfect wife” should do. I didn’t know that it was useless trying to do these [...]

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Accepting the Past and My Emotional Affair

Posted on 19. Nov, 2010 by Doug.

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Linda’s post from yesterday was by coincidence quite timely. I received an email yesterday from a former co-worker that the once-manager of our office was moving out of town, and that they were going to have a going away party for him. Though I’ve known this person for probably 15 years and I like and [...]

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Erasing the Fantasy After the Affair

Posted on 18. Nov, 2010 by Linda.

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After the recent revelations of several couples we know who are suffering from infidelity, I began to think about if our marriage will ever be safe. Will I ever feel secure that Tanya will never enter our lives again? Willard Harley’s book, “Surviving an Affair” paints a grim picture when he discusses contact after the [...]

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Discussion: Should a Cheating Spouse Confess?

Posted on 17. Nov, 2010 by Doug.

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Happy Wednesday! Many of the recent comments have centered around the subject of confession. As we stated in a previous post on the subject, there are only two possibilities – confess, or don’t confess. However, there are arguments for both sides of the fence, and this week we’d like to hear some of your thoughts. [...]